how do you cope with voices?

[sara]

I've read a lot about different ways in which people cope with voices - listening to music seems a good one. I'd be interested to hear how people using the site cope with hearing voices?

[psychologist]

Yes, at the Sussex hearing voices groups many people find listening to music helpful. Some other strategies people use to cope with voices include:
talking to people
keeping a diary about the voices
yoga
singing
medication

I guess we each have different ways of coping. It would be good to share ways of coping on this site. How else do you cope with the voices?

[agray]

Ron Coleman has talked about how he sets aside a period of time most evenings during which he talks to his voices, this allows him to tell them to leave him be for the rest of the day - I know some people who have tried this strategy and found it helpful to various degrees.

[Chris]

I find that actually talking back to the voices sometimes makes them go away. (e.g. letting them know what they want to know and then politely asking them to leave you alone while you do something.)

I also did some work with one of my CPN's which involves lying on my bed, tensing up individul muscles one by one and then totally relaxing them and breathing out as doing so. This seems to releave some of the symptons.

[sara]

these ideas look good - reminds me of someone I know who finds that yoga helps with her voices. I try to do a bit of yoga in the front room most days as it can really help me to relax.

[george]

In my experience, spending time learning what activates the voices proves invaluable, because then you know how to exactly deal with them. For example, recently, I watched a television programme late at night and the content of the programme really spooked me out. As soon as my fear started, I felt a presence in the room (I live alone) and I began to hear voices. After a few minutes of analysing what had happened, I was able to realise that my own fear had activated a psychotic episode of hallucinations. As soon as I understood that, I was able to deal with it. I played a comedy DVD and by the time that had finished all signs of psychosis had gone. I think I may be one of the lucky ones, though.

[sara]

Hi - that sounds like a really good way of coping with voices by making sense of them and taking back some control.
I think fear and stress often play a part with voices - the few times that I have heard voices were mostly when I was under a lot of stress.

[Lou]

check out with friends what voices are saying

duvet surfing

Star Trek videos/DVD's

music/singing

screaming

Being alone

online surfing

talking back to them

lessening stress in any other area of my life

drink a couple of cognacs [only takes 2, hey I'm a cheap date!]

writing snotty letters to nursing journals

[Chris]

Excuse my ignorance but what is duvet surfing? :)

[sara]

oh yeah - I know people who duvet surf - and done it myself too - for me I see it as hiding under the duvet so you don't have to engage with the world for a while - is that what you meant Lou?

[Lou]

that's the one Sara!

[LOUISE]

I find that duvet surfing can be a way of having some time to myself so that I can take a bit of time out and then face the world again when I am in a better frame of mind to deal with things. Sometimes it does help to have a bit of space to myself away from the world, but at other times it can actually make me feel worse and can make me feel quite low.

I know other people have mentioned music and for me listening to favourite songs is often a way of helping to relieve anxiety and stress.

[Diana]

I met someone who says meditation really helps with their voices, and something called mindfulness - anyone know what that is?

[Lou]

could be connected to Buddhism

[Jenny]

I chose Jesus. The more I searched and asked God..the deeper my realtionship grew with Him...the less I heard voices. Now, I don't hear voices at all...I'm completely healed. I'm aware that some readers may have had some unhelpful experiences with regard to church and christianity, but I ask you not to judge by other people but search the Bible and ask God, yourself. God is a gentleman and will not push His way into your life. But if you want Him, He'll meet you where you are.

God bless and keep you all

Jenny

[Lou]

I think it's fine whatever we find helpful, whether that is organised religion, meditation, Shamanism, art, medical or non-medical approaches, other voice hearers, mutual support, accepting voices, integrating them into our lives or whatever. It doesn't matter what helps

[Jenny]

OK....so let's hear from people who practise non-Christian 'coping strategies' - meditation etc who can honestly say that their voices never came back EVER and have secured complete healing FOR GOOD without Jesus. I've been a born-again Christian for years, this healing isn't something that just happened to me...I'm saying that this isn't a case of 'a flash in the pan' with any chance of voices coming back when I come down off my 'high'. This healing is permanent. I don't take medication and I've never had such peace and joy in my life as I do with Jesus. I'm an Evangelist...that's not organised religion.

I appreciate that there may be folk whose medication has helped them to not hear voices anymore...

[Lou]

Noone here would deny or disrespect your experience. In your experience you have been healed and religion works for you which is great, good on you!

There are people who no longer hear voices because they have worked through some of the original trauma's that triggered their voice hearing.

Others have non-religious [and non-medical] ways of coping with their voices, having accepted them and integrated them into their lives.

There are so many diverse ways of approaching voice hearing which involve the full spectrum of medical, non-medical, psychological, parapsychological, spiritual, religious, non-religious, mutual support to name but a few.

The great thing I like about the hearing voices movement is that it is accepting of any frame of reference, any belief system and choosen supports/strategies for coping.

I'm sure people will talk about their journey and how they have managed it.

You can read more on the Intervoice forum which has been around for longer about non-medical and spiritual [religious and non-religious] ways of coping.

[Lou]

ps
in my personal experience I've met very few people whose medication has completely stopped them from hearing voices

[sara]

I'm really pleased for you Jenny that the voices have left you alone since choosing the support of God and Jesus. Congratulations. I think you are not alone and that other people too have also been helped by their faith in God.

I also agree with Lou - one of the things I like most about hearing voices network is that we respect and value whatever works for you and within your frame of reference. For some that may be praying and Jesus, for others it may be some other religious or spiritual support, for others psychological, medical, others talking to friends, singing, art, work, football or a mixture of these and others. What's great is that each person can find a way of understanding voices that they find helpful, and also ways of coping and living life that's good for them.

I can think of someone who was helped and never again troubled by voices after using shamanic ideas, and someone else who used to be very troubled by the voices who hasn't heard voices for several years (fingers crossed that she won't be troubled again) after psychological therapy.

[Diana]

that's just great Jenny.
let's pray others can be helped too.

[Lou]

Indeed, others will be helped that way for whom that appeals to

[Jenny]

Diana, are you a Christian, too?

[sara]

I wonder if what's important is finding a wider context, pupose and meaning in life - for some religion and faith in God is a really good way of finding this.

For others it may be something totally different like politics and campaigning, work, consideration of the environment and climate change, science or philosophy.

I guess some people get a lot of value out of these, and there are also thoose who have been hurt by each of these.

We each need to find something that fits for us.

[Lou]

You have a good point. There are specific coping strategies, but in terms of overall functioning whether it's hearing voices, or any expression of distress, I reckon we all need purpose and meaning.
This is found in as many ways as coping with voices are! My greatest love is dancing which for me is a deeply spiritual experience. My greatest passion is activism, it's my vocation but it's also a serious and sometimes quite wearing business. To counter that I need things which are completely non-mental health related and get into the playful side of me, for me that's a star trek convention/silly costumes etc.
I was born to be an activist, my experiences led me to this path, but if I had not gone mad, I'm sure I would have been working for Greenpeace sitting in a boat in front of the harpoon or something

[sara]

yeah. I'm a bit of an activist as well. In my younger days I was involved in quite a few direct actions around pornograpghy and the like - e.g. we took down the top shelf magazines in Smiths and managed to get them to stop selling them for a while.
Now I'm more quietly active around madness and also green issues. I'm really keen to reduce my carbon footprint and am quite passionate about that - trying to use public transport where possible, and not flying - hard tho as I love sunshine and travel.

I also get a sense of perspective from nature - I especially love the sea - I love swimming in it, surfing, kayaking, but most of all just sitting and watching it - I find the power of the sea that we people cannot tame, is a real lesson about the world, how we are not as important as we think we are and how therefore, our problems are also not as important as we think they are.

[Lou]

Nature is awesome, I would love to see Antartica before it all falls into the ocean...

[sara]

I was talking to someone this week - and we didn't see eye to eye about some strategies we both find helpful for coping.

I wondered whether you thought there was an important difference between distracting youself (e.g. by counting) and doing something that you enjoy or are good at (e.g. for me this might be walking by the sea)?

It'd be good to see whatyou think?

[Lou]

Yep I think there's a difference between distraction and doing something you enjoy. Distraction is sometimes about remaining out of danger or surviving, whereas doing something you enjoy is more about engaging. In saying that sometimes what we enjoy can also mean facing our demons

[sara]

yeah - I think they are different too. I see distraction as a coping strategy that helps you get therough temporarily whilst doing things that you are good at or enjoy or are more meaningful also have an additional and more lasting benefit and can help our self esteem and the way we seee ourselves. I thin I also grow through these but maybe not through things which are only a distraction. I suppose there is an overlap as some things might fall into both categories.

[pythagoras]

hi everyone
i hear voices 1 year and a half and it sucks like no other...:(
there is a trick to shut them up for a while:) ...at least for me...i cannot explain very well ...but somehow u shut them up virtually in your head very rapidly..the voices are getting very nasty when u do that:eek: ...and they dont like it at all:D ...but if u master it is kind of a "firewall" (unfortunately it works for a while)

in the beginning u might find it extremely hard to shut the voice up but if u try harder you will do better...u dont have anyother choice...

[Lorenza]

Hi just joined. I'm finding it interesting reading your stuff. Though some people promoting the religious way :eek: me a bit. But i will refrain from going off on one and say that i have found singing in my head over my voice helpful.

[Chris]

Welcome Pythagoras and Lorenza,

I agree that the religious way is definitely not for all (myself included) - although I have had "god like" halucinations... weird eh? But I'm not religious in the slightest.

I also find singing, or loud music to be a great distraction.

To be honest I've been on a drug called amisulpride for about 7 months now and since about a few weeks after i started taking it I haven't had a serious halucination! - Which is great news as far as I'm concerned, I don't even miss the voices, which had happened to me in the past on some meds.

Anyway, great thread!

[sara]

hi - yeah - a lot of people find singing helpful - and less side effects than lot of treatments. One guy I know who sings a lot to help with voices also makes up his own raps about them.

I'm interested in what you say pythagoras - about the voices getting nasty when you try to shut them up virtually in your head. I wonder if it's that you are on to it. Voices often seem to get nasty when you start beating them - it's like they know you are winning but try desparately to stop you by being worse than ever.

[Lorenza]

HI, thanks for the welcome Chris
I agree Sara it is interesting about voices getting nastier. Mine tends to be nasty or bad always but it does get worse when i try to agnore it. I came to realise that my voice came about because i refused to express pain in anyway shape or form. It's like having very hurt spiteful tourettes suffering thirteen year old living with me:rolleyes: What i have found though that the more confident i became and the more self-esteem i got in myself, eased it's present, but it's never gone. On a positive it does remind me to deal with things as they crop up, otherwise it gets worse. I do feel it is important to deal with as much as poss so it makes you stronger to deal with the things that are left.
And Chris not missing the voices is good. The only time my voice went was when i got stoned and it was weird cause it freaked me out:eek: (recovering control freak:D ) It's crazy in it's self when you miss the thing that bugs you.

[Lorenza]

Ps.
I think Chris that having religious hallucinations isn't weird. Unfortunately religion has been a huge influence and has a strong symbolism involved(maybe your mind used it to symbolise something that was happening for you at the time, bar becoming God that is:) Being a art student i use the symbols of religion in my work sometimes. Art is good in helping and great to get your drama queening out of your system:D

[Diana]

Hi - I've been helping my relative to try out the coping strategies other people have mentioned on this site.

She's found that listening to music, singing and watching comedy has been helpful. Some of them didn't help her tho. Great to see so many ideas here!

[echo78]

hello there Pythagoras and Lorenza, lou, jenny, and louise
i just want to say hi and it nice to meet ya all.

when my voices tend to come to me, i uesed distract my self it just make them more worse and more angry. At the begining i used my headphones with music blasting away and if they came to me around some where public i would use my phone to talk to them. then ask them to come to me at a more suiterble time. Some time they are not so abliging. so the only other option is to distract your self. my experances may be diffrent to some one else and what works for some people does not work for others. Also i tryed to use meditation and desdenitising my self with all lights of and just sofft muisc playing.

i also had to except that i was hearing voices. I just took them for what they are. Thats the hard one to get your head round. i dont know how i did that it just clicked in place.

Also i tend to ask them quetions and get to know them to see what make them tick. Also i used to put on music on My headphones in the house and do some card makeing or painting. which some times is not ideal as i would not hear the phone go or door/nocking. Also i found useing headphone kinda isolates you as people cant talk to you.

They only time my voice came to me with religeous tendencies is when they tryed to put people into categories good, preteneder and evil. I never asked why he was doing this may be i ask him to see if he will tell me.

i still have not come to an answer why they are comeing to me. may be if i talk to them and ask the right qusetion it may dawn on me.

I also try and see them as not apart of me kinda seprate them from me. IF you know what i mean ? It better that way as them i can sepratet my thoughs and feeling from them. its kinda like treating them as if they was people who have feeling emotions ect standing in frount of me.

well thats my expreance with my voices.

hope this can help anyone if you need to ask me any qusetions iam here to answer to the best of my ability.
hug to all and take care
Echo xxx

[flashy]

gawd i cant listen to music.... they sing along n change th words lol does my head in... i got told not to ingage with th voices... i ended up givin em names n stuff.. kinda bad becoz i started to make them real... dont realy no how i cope wiv them... used to drink n that helped!!! but ended up an alcoholic!!! bad to worse... jus gotta ignore em... hard to begin wiv but after awhile they fade away!!! kinda miss th funny stuff they did to my head!!! i look back now n always laugh at how completely nuts i was!!!!!

[echo78]

hi there flashy,
Am struggling to not make them real in my head. but some how they get what they want at time just to shut them up. iam really struggling at the moment with them. i have not yet come up with anything that take them away. i dont think there is any thing may be tablets but i have no idea which one as yet as the ones i am on are not doing any good. At frist they kinda helped.
well it was nice to meet ya
em xx

[24/7voices]

my experience of hearing voices is becoming too much. i have been looking for a thread which mirrors my experience but unfortunately, none do. Perhaps because the nature of my experience is sexual and maybe people don't want to share their experience because of that.
i live in a block of flats and i hear people from all sides, and below me having sex but not just that i hear their inner voices (one at a time usually) as they call my name. They want to 'virtually' do it with me. As in: with their imagination. This sounds far fetched but i have actually felt their energy moving through me as i was synchronised with them as they do what they do.
o.k. so whats the problem? Firstly, they are convinced that i am a "paedophile" and keep telling me so, which depresses me. At this point i would like to strongly point out that I am NOT a paedophile.
Secondly, they are now saying they can see through me-as in see what i see.
I went out last night for a drink and as i was queueing up to get in and my eyes starting looking all over the place and i felt panicky. This is not normal.
And the final thing is that i can constantly hear them. Sometimes even through music. Like someone else on here said it happened to them: the lyrics seem to change meaning and it drags you back in. so now i have opted for chillout instrumental music. Anyways. will check back to see what ppl have to say.:(

[Chris]

Hi 24/7voices Sorry your post didn't get through before, it was unapproved automatically because of the word "sex" in them. It should be visible to everyone now, sorry for the hassle

[Floyd]

They often are better, if you are doing an activity that costs money, like shopping. Also dont get voices if i am abroad.
I have a load of photo's from when i was in Luxor Egypt. If anyone wants to see them:)

[echo78]

24/7voices,

i am so sorry that you are going though a hard time with the noise/voices.
i just want to say you are not alone with this and i also have some kind of s#xual content of my voice and even hear him doing things to him self. He also say what he doing and how he doing it, he says he watching me undress and having a bath and when i am with my husband. Its so hard to ignore him but he not always like this, some time he just comments on every day things.
i also find music only help up to a point it kinda distance the voices like if he on the radio as am watching TV. at the same time. It is very upsetting when they get like this and i also find it harder to cope with this to.

i want to say that remember you are not alone in this and we are all hear to help if we can. if you find it hard to talk about on the forum you are most welcome to P.M me.

((((hugs ))))
em xxx

[echo78]

Floyd,
wow one day would love to see the site and scenery Egypt. i wanted to go to London British museum to see the Egyptian display. sign we did go to London and see all the site expect the museum as we ran out of time and had to get the train back home.

thanks for asking to shaw your photoes
looking for wards to see them.
em xxx

[sara]

hi - that sounds really difficult. Are there any times when they are better? or times when they are worse? Have they always been like that?

Clever idea to listen to music without words.

Although I have not had the experience you describe, I am aware that a lot of people do experience voices which include a sexual aspect. For some this seems to relate to something going on currently, for others it may seem relate to something which happened in the past. I am aware that a majority of people who hear voices have experienced abuse or other trauma when they were younger. Sounds like there are a lot of people thinking of you.

[lbrierley]

Yes diary stuff can be helpful so I'm told. When my sister was hallucinating she would write everything down and told my mum and I that it really helped. She would also draw pictures in her diary.;)